For non-WoW people, Death Knights were basically mindless slaves. Raised from the dead, they were controlled by the iron will of a bad guy. Now they're released and need to fit back into the world of the living...
My character, Haken, is unusual in that he has no memories of his life before death. All he knows is serving the Lich King, His voice in his head, His will to blindly follow. So, being "free" is not a good thing to him, it's a horrible punishment.
We've had a new player and character in our little RP circle, another mentally messed up DK. Unlike Haken, this other DK is making fast progress towards becoming something new. Haken's been around for weeks (months now?) and he makes slow tiny baby steps.
On one hand, this makes sense. Even baby steps are giant steps for him. On the other, for the first time ever, I'm envying the progress of others (other characters). I'm OOCly sad that it's always Haken who is doing bad things ("No! Don't hit that kid! I don't care what she did! We can't take you anywhere!") -- not on purpose, he just doesn't know better, but still. It's Haken who people keep secrets from ("OMG, don't tell him X is pregnant!"), it's him who people don't like to be around, don't want to be around, are afraid of, hate, etc.
It's fully IC on everyone's part, and it's a reasonable IC reaction to Haken, but it makes me a little down OOCly. I want better for him. I want him to be liked, to be loved, to be accepted, to be helpful and wanted and all that. Haken couldn't care less about any of that.
This is strange. Usually I'm happy and fine with my characters being tortured (literally or otherwise!), but in this case Haken doesn't even know or care that he's getting the short end of the stick and it's bothering me?
Very, very confusing.