Thistle (thistle_chaser) wrote,

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I'm losing my memory of food...

I noticed something really odd last night. Before surgery, I used to play a game while falling asleep: If you could pick any three foods in the world and have an unlimited amount of them to eat, what three foods would you pick? You didn't have to worry about getting tired of them, as the next night you could pick three new ones.

I couldn't think of three foods I wanted to eat. I couldn't think of even one I wanted an unlimited amount of! In fact, I had a hard time thinking of ANY food besides chicken, cheese, and strawberries (about the only things I've been eating since I started in on solid foods again). And that wasn't even fried chicken, it was boring, limp, grilled chicken strips. After much thought, I decided I would like a little baked potato. "A little", not an unlimited amount.

That made me realize that I couldn't even imagine eating a lot anymore. I mean that literally: I was unable to mentally picture eating more than a couple tiny bites of anything.

Even though this change is a good thing(???), I feel like I've been brainwashed against my will. How could I be unable to think of three things I'd like to eat? Especially since I was really hungry! I feel betrayed by... something. I knew the surgery would change my body, but I thought my brain would be safe. Even today, right now, posting, I can't think of a food I'd like to eat. It's 10:30 AM, I haven't had any breakfast and I'm hungry, yet I can't think of a single food item I'd like to have.

This is really scary. What other changes have happened to my brain that I don't know about?
Tags: health: bariatric surgery, things that scare thistles
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