August 11th, 2008

tree

A hodgepodge of a post! (WoW, FFXI, Avatar, RP, RL)

FFXI hasn't been fun for me for a long, long time. In fact, I can't remember the last time I had fun on the game. What few things I do on game feel like nothing but work. That's a bad trait in a game you're paying $15/month for.

About three years ago, I gave WoW a try. I had burned out on FFXI, had nearly quit, so I decided to check it out. It's like a MMO vacation spot! Bright, colorful, amazingly easy! (And highly amusingly, they've made it even easier in the years I've been gone. Lowered fees for things! Give even more XP away! Lowered level requirements!) So hey, maybe since I'm not having fun on FFXI, WoW would now work for me?

Installed it, patched, logged on almost two hours ago. The answer to the above question: A big meh. See, I don't want to play WoW, I want FFXI to be fun again. :/ Everything in WoW is wacky and different. I couldn't even move at first, heh. And the idea of actually touching the mouse on purpose! And the (lack of? different?) camera control keeps making me motion sick. Last time I played I only stayed a month, I doubt this visit will be any longer. (Oh, but a cool thing? My character from three years ago was still there, right where I left him, with all his stuff and all that.)

But what I'd really like to do, even more than WoW or having FFXI be fun again, is RP. "So log onto FF MUX and RP!" I can, and I have, but... but it's so meaningless (my part in it, not the game as a whole). Right now my character could ICly vanish forever and no one would notice. In months, years, maybe one or two people might, but I have no connections to anything in the game. Any RP I get is just random RP with random people with both of us grasping for a subject so we can keep the scene going a little longer. I want connections, I'd say "relationships", but that might imply stuff I don't mean. I want someone to ICly know I exist. I want to be part of something. Le sigh!

And now: Avatar. I decided to dive in and start re-watching it. That's really helpful with learning/remembering who the characters are. "Ooooh, that's who that is!" "Oh, this is where he came from, right!" But more than re-watching the series, I'm really happy that I found fanfic. It keeps the series alive even though it's over. And it's funny how it changes your view of characters... While watching the series, I disliked Sokka. To put it more exactly, I had no respect for him. I don't like characters who are supposed to be "the funny one". However, I'm in the middle of a long fic, and it's really changing my opinion of him. It takes place right after the series ends, and the characters are totally the same, but somehow he's working for me better than in the TV series. I can't explain that, but it's a pretty darned cool thing. (Also cool is how well some of these writers keep the 'cartoon' vibe. Somehow you can see it as animated in your head, as opposed to fics in other fandoms where you just read it and 'see' it like you would a book.)

I think what I'm going to do is look for an Avatar RP (MU*, LJ, something). If I can find a good one, that'd kill two birds with one stone. (I'm just a little nervous, I've never done RP over LJ before, but that seems to be the new thing, where all the MU* players have vanished to). And this time, I won't forget to cancel WoW after my month! I paid for six or seven extra months last time because I thought if I didn't log on it wouldn't bill me, heh.

I just wish I could lose this restless feeling. Settle down. Be happy with my "hobby" type things. I really, really hate the feeling of wanting to stay at work because I'm dissatisfied with the stuff I do after it.
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