Thistle (thistle_chaser) wrote,

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For the past two days, my left eye has been twitching. The "amusing" thing is that it's actually started happening more at times I'm really stressed/annoyed. I feel like a cartoon character about to explode!

Life hasn't been too cheery the last couple of days, building up to last night which was the worst night I've had in a while.

Part of it is my own fault. On top of not sleeping nearly enough all week (5 hours a night of broken sleep just does not cut it, nor do the nightmares I've been having all week), my eating is going downhill fast! Yesterday I had oatmeal for breakfast, noodles for lunch, and (get this) tatertots for dinner! Welcome to the all-carb diet! I'm the Anti-Atkins! Not one bit of protein in sight! I suck. While I lost a pound last week when I thought I wouldn't, I'm betting this week will be a weight-gained week. Sigh. So annoying! And I'm so so so very sick of watching what I eat! And guess what, I have YEARS of it ahead of me! Heck, it's a lifestyle, not a diet, so I get to do this till the day I die! (Oh yay!)

I have a new thing on my list of "Signs I'm PMSing": Being ready to quit FFXI. Last night I put 330K into leathercrafting... and got a total of .2 skill increase. (Apparently 85 is another one of those "walls" where skillups slow down.) As if that's not bad enough, check this out: To get past level 90 of leathercrafting, I have to skill on items that use one of these three hides:

1) A hide that costs a million for one piece. (There are usually a couple for sale at any given time.)
2) A hide that costs about 50K for one piece. (Rarely at the AH.)
3) A hide that costs about 40-50K at the AH for one piece. (Almost never for sale.)

Now, add onto that that I need to do maybe 25-30 synths for a .1 skillup and what do you get? SE has made it impossible for an honest player (or at least a player not in a HNM LS) to get higher than 90. I do not cheat, I give SE ALL of my free time, I give SE extra money (non-players: you have to pay for each character you have. I have four total.). I do everything in this game "right", and yet it's impossible for me to reach the highest level of crafting. I thought about this last night. Know the only way for me to get past 90? Bot fish. That's right, the very only way I will ever "win" is to cheat. SE has to know that. How can they twist my arm into cheating? How can they make me pick between "play honest and fail, or cheat and win"? I'm not looking for an easy way! I Am Not Being Lazy! I have put as much time and money into this game as they could ask, and yet I can still only level higher than 90 by cheating! That makes me so mad and so sad! And what's worse? So many other people cheat, and SE does nothing to stop it!

I cannot believe the stress this game brings into my life. I've said it before and I'll probably say it again: I have to stop crafting in it. But even if I stop, that doesn't end the unfairness of it. I hate the game so very much.


Lost: I (of course) have my Tivo set to record Lost. While watching it last night, I noticed Tivo wasn't recording it, so I tried to start it myself. It said it was full. (WTF?) So on a commercial, I checked what it had saved. Nine Lost eps and two other half-hour shows. What the hell? I thought the drive was like 20 or 40 hours, how could it be full with only 10 hours of stuff? (Maybe because it records them in high quality?)

But whatever. I deleted all the old Lost eps off Tivo and started downloading them onto my computer. I'd much rather have them on Tivo, but whatever. (At least the copies were made from high def showings of the eps, so the quality will be really high.)

So anyway, last night's ep. Even though I logged off FFXI, I can't say I enjoyed Lost. I was too angry and too ready to cry. I'm sure lots of info and hints were dropped, but I'm going to have to do my usual thing of re-watching it over the weekend and see.

And now back to work, which is just horrible this week. (Hi twitching eye! So nice of you to join us for this post!) The worst part is that once I'm done with the bad work stuff, it's not like I can go "yay, it's over and done!" because we have to repeat it over and over and over again. Literally, it never ends. It's never finished. As soon as you're done, you get maybe a half-day "break" to do "just" support stuff, then it's back to this damned extra crap. I swear, if anything extra bad happens today, I'm going to quit and walk out. And ha ha! Now I'm almost crying! PMS sucks. Stupid tears, go away.
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